Eli Wretch


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Date of Death: 11/9/73

Favorite Snack: Squirrel jerky

Favorite Color: Axel grease brown

Kills Time By: Playing road-kill bingo

Hobbies: Warning people about stuff, tinkering with machines

Favorite Scent: Truck stop bathrooms

Dream Occupation: Greeting card writer

Road Map: Spent his days wedged on a dusty dashboard viewing the world through a muddy windshield.

Favorite Meal: Dump Rat Stew

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